i'll always remember my family..

an image

the fact that family doesn't always come first within our priorities' circle sometimes hits me so hard, i could get migraine for weeks (just an expression, i am perfectly healthy and would like to continue being one) especially when we did something selfish or just plain good 'to-protect-our-family' stuff. albeit all the good reasons one will give to retain his/her stand, doubt will enter the soul of a particular member of the family and a new conflict will surface. someone's having some issues. and it's the 'golden-child' issue.


according to me (ha-ha), it seems like it's compulsory to have one, two or three that came to the guardian's liking (specifically parents) which could probably be for a reason that only they know which i assume it's something related to their own childhood experience. a really disturbing idea for us but it's true. there goes the anak emas of the family that had it all. their mistakes are like the beautifully constructed drama design to entertain the bias parents. their flaws are their immaculate series of good history and the other children, probably the copper child, iron child or possibly magnesium child, clustered together at a dark corner, waiting for their turns for their parents' unconditional love. i'm not insulting parents as a whole because not all are 'practicing' this kind of love, but the most of them whom are not aware at all that their other types of metals children can see the obvious. it does hurt.. deep down inside..


my stand
yes, most of you who'll be reading this might as well guessed that i'm highly experienced under this matter. well, u guessed right. almost. surely, it's because i'm looking only at my side of story and it's not fair to judge things in just one view. Allah made it clear that things He did was with a reason thus it's not my right to put blame to my parents or any other parents just because i'm angry, frustrated and felt exceptionally sad over this. i had been suffering for 17 years under the illusion that i am a copper child and that my parents didn't really care for me when the real reason is that they had their ways in handling each child of their own. (audience: pondering... wistfully [yeah, rite!])

you might probably didn't remember how you act when you were still very young. how naughty you are and the hard times your parents had, to control your hyperactive way of life. i'm sure most of you surely forgot about that..

alamak! since time is running out.. i cabut la dulu. nanti kita sambung isu ni.. bila ada rasa nak sambungla.. hahaha